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Update: I posted about losing my motivation to play the drums and then I threw my sticks at my teacher

FireDrum

FireDrum

Member
Okay, that wasn't entirely true :D. I felt like throwing my sticks at my drum teacher.
Click (excuse the pun) bait in the title (my teacher is obsessed with the metronome and if I hear the word semi quaver one more time, which I still don't know what it is, nor care, I might actually try and poke a stick up one of his nostrils).
I said before how I have had three teachers and my third said that to be a good drummer, it will take many years. I have been learning the Rockschool graded exams in the UK. I am on grade one (so not really learning them, I have hardly begun and at this pace, will be dead before reaching the final grade). I am in the UK. I suffer from agoraphobia so it is hard for me to find another teacher (this one is close by) and also hard to find a band too who might let me play with them.
I really appreciated your advice before. And just wanted to provide an update.
I do still enjoy playing the drums and yet, practicing each day can feel like a chore and going to lessons also feels like a chore. Lessons are only for 30 minutes once a week.
I have been playing the drums for a year. I am very much a beginner but I have improved because even when I don't feel like playing, I still do.
I have tried to play other songs but still end up trying to perfect the songs for grade one because that is what I do with my teacher. Ignite (I mentioned that one before) is now easy. I can now play others. To take the exam, you have to play three practice pieces. But my teacher says we have to learn every song in the book for the exam (there are 9). I admit to being driven to take the exams (helps me to feel worthy I guess) but of course, if I have to perfect every song in every book of 8 grades, this will take time. In fact, my teacher said that it takes about a year or longer per book/per exam.
Today, I threw my toys out of the pram. Fed up with him saying...count with me...1 and 2 and 3 and...me just wanting to play with the music, I said to him directly, so if it takes a year for each exam, and therefore eight to ten years for me to be 'good', then I will be paying you £8000 to £10,000 to accomplish this. He looked a little startled at my directness but admitted that to be true. Probably does take longer if students have to learn every single song in every single book.
So my mojo is still in decline. I don't want to give up but I do find drumming hard. Yet have been told I have a talent for it.
I don't think I am asking anything really, more providing an update to anyone who cares to read this.
This is a link to one of the tracks by Nirvana for the first exam. I can't play it (way too fast, I can if I slow it down).
But to me, for a beginner, I think this is pretty hard for just the first grade (which is meant to be for beginners). Wonder what anyone else thinks.

 
I was told by a gigging drummer that as little as half a dozen lessons (I had about ten) can be enough foundation in the basics to start to teach yourself.
You can then learn a huge amount by PLAYING along to the music you love (a lot!) and applying those basics.
There's a ton of info online too (incl. DW!)
I'm now in my first gigging band and love it.
Alternatively, there is no limit to the skills you could learn through an academic course and working through book exercises - but it's not for everyone.
 
FireDrum said:
But to me, for a beginner, I think this is pretty hard for just the first grade (which is meant to be for beginners). Wonder what anyone else thinks.
Click to expand...
I'm currently doing a "beginner" course on Drumeo just for maintenance. TBH, it's comparable to the Nirvana song you linked.

However, there are beginner courses on Drumeo that are much easier than the Nirvana song. I think I recommended Drumeo in your first post, so yes, I may sound like a broken record and probably isn't a helpful suggestion -sorry for that.

Have you tried playing along with drumless tracks available on YouTube??

Also sounds like it's time to ditch your teacher because he doesn't seem like a good fit. I'm sorry for your struggles with teachers, etc. IMO, it does sound like an online solution might be a good fit.

I think @Jonathan Curtis is in UK. He's a teacher and may be a good source for what to do next (I realize you didn't ask for suggestions, but your post begs a solution).

Please keep us posted regarding your progress. (y)
 
The video sounded good. We all hit plateaus in our drumming progress. It’s also good to have a teacher. A couple of obvious things seem to be to meet your teacher every two weeks or take a month-long break to work through the lessons you already have in front of you.
 
it will NOT take you 8 years to get proficient....BUT, you DO need to know what semi-quavers are, and how they fit into the overall pulse to understand how to oprganize all the rhytmhs you hear when playing.

I would be happy to give you some video lessons on that subject that will hopefully put it in a "better light". It sounds to me like your teacher is not good at reading the way YOU learn, and is just "teaching blindly" as I say.

but, understanding how rhythms work around a steady pulse is sort of "drumming 101", and I want you to feel better about living in that world.

PM me if you are interested!!!
 
I don't know anything about the grading level (I have never heard of that for drum set stuff), but Come As You Are is definitely a beginning level drum set song. I use this a lot for my beginner drummers, as well as some AC/DC stuff.

It has all of the qualities that a good starter song has:
- medium tempo
- standard rock beat
- not a lot of crazy fills
- repetetive phrasing

but you are not going to learn ANY musical conceot without repetition, failure, and defining details. I always tell my new students "this is NOT an instant success activity". There is going to be failure, assessment, retrying, more failure, more assessment...and then it will be good. And even then, you will move on to other things that need more repetition, failure, and reassessment. You don't just "check off the box" in music
 
Xstr8edgtnrdrmrX said:
BUT, you DO need to know what semi-quavers are, and how they fit into the overall pulse to understand how to oprganize all the rhytmhs you hear when playing.
Click to expand...
[Emphasis mine]

That was... superlative,

drummer's organize the opera.

Right?
 
beatdat said:
[Emphasis mine]

That was... superlative,

drummer's organize the opera.

Right?
Click to expand...

yep...when they play!! Most of the operas I have played in were like 500 measures of tacet, one triangle hit, and then 500 more measures of rest
 
To me, it seems pretty clear that you want to PLAY the drums, but you don’t want to STUDY the drums.

There’s nothing wrong with that. Studying music isn’t for everyone.

Step back and look objectively at your own words:

FireDrum said:
I felt like throwing my sticks at my drum teacher.
Click to expand...

It sounds like you resent the teacher.

FireDrum said:
if I hear the word semi quaver one more time, which I still don't know what it is, nor care,
Click to expand...

It sounds like you resent the underlying fundamentals of music.

FireDrum said:
I said before how I have had three teachers and my third said that to be a good drummer, it will take many years.
Click to expand...

It sounds like you resent the time commitment involved in the learning process.

FireDrum said:
I do still enjoy playing the drums and yet, practicing each day can feel like a chore and going to lessons also feels like a chore.
Click to expand...

It sounds like you resent practicing and attending the lessons.

FireDrum said:
But my teacher says we have to learn every song in the book for the exam (there are 9).
Click to expand...

It sounds like you resent the song repertoire that is part of the curriculum you signed up for.

FireDrum said:
In fact, my teacher said that it takes about a year or longer per book/per exam.
Click to expand...

It sounds like you resent the time frame that is mapped out for each portion of the curriculum you signed up for.

FireDrum said:
Fed up with him saying...count with me...1 and 2 and 3 and...me just wanting to play with the music,
Click to expand...

It sounds like you resent the fact that studying drums involves counting.

FireDrum said:
I said to him directly, so if it takes a year for each exam, and therefore eight to ten years for me to be 'good', then I will be paying you £8000 to £10,000 to accomplish this.
Click to expand...

It sounds like you resent the financial cost of lessons.

Keep in mind that this entire undertaking is optional. You signed up for it willingly. However…when you did so, you probably had an entirely different idea about what it means to study drums.

Now that you’ve taken lessons with several different teachers, and have discovered the reality of what it means to study drums…give yourself permission to drop it. Rather than allowing all of this resentment to keep accumulating, give yourself permission to just quit lessons and let go of studying drums.

Finding yet ANOTHER teacher is not going to help. No matter what teacher you choose, they’re going to eventually attempt to help you study drumming since that’s what you’re paying them for. In other words, it will always eventually come back to semi-quavers and counting and 100 other things that you haven’t even mentioned yet (such as rudiments).

Let yourself off the hook. You willingly entered into this adventure, and you can willingly exit. Play the drums to your heart’s content in your own way with the songs that you like…but stop torturing yourself (and perhaps these drum teachers) by insisting on studying drums when you really don’t want to do so.

I sincerely hope this post gives you a new perspective that ultimately ends up being helpful to you.
 
It sounds like you are trying to rush things a bit. How long do YOU think it should take you “to be good”? You say learning the drums is hard. Yeah. You got that right. If it was easy everybody would do it. And that goes for not just many things but MOST things. How many years do you think Vinnie Colaiuta took lessons and studied before landing his first gig? You can replace Vinnie’s name with virtually any highly respected drummer out there in that sentence. Your comments also make me wonder what you think is “good”?

Tired of counting? Give up the drums. Tired of practicing? Give up the drums. You’ve been playing the drums for an entire year? That’s nothing. Being good at anything that is as complex as drumming where you have to use 4 limbs simultaneously and often some limbs are doing more than one thing at a time takes time.

My intent is not to diminish your drive and dream of being a “good” drummer. But I think your expectations are unrealistic. Others have said essentially the same things. Not all teachers are good teachers. And even a good teacher may not follow an approach to learning that works for you. That is part of the drumming journey. Finding someone who can guide you in drumming that matches your way of learning isn’t always easy.

I first started taking lessons from a local jazz player when I was 14. That was around 1976. I only mention that for context. He was a phenomenal player and he started me learning rudiments, basic beats and then when I was ready for it, he started me playing to records. He got sick and eventually passed away. I then sought lessons wherever I could. My best friend also played the drums back then and was a lot better than me. He was great about sharing some cool stuff that was particularly practical and directly applied to the drumset. Another friend who was also phenomenal gave me lessons for a bit. I took lessons at Drummers Collective. In college I was studying pre-law but took a class (lessons actually) that focused just on snare drumming. I also played in the jazz ensemble in college for class credit. I got some real valuable lessons from that in performance. I also took lessons from a local jazz drummer up there (Buffalo).

Someone else said you seem motivated to PLAY the drums but may not be motivated to STUDY the drums. I think his point is valid. If it’s not true, it will be up to you to prove that to yourself. Learning anything new is typically a process. That doesn’t mean you have to LOVE doing rudiments or counting but without the fundamentals you may not get very far. I’m 62 and restarted playing again after a 30 year hiatus (chasing a corporate career). And lately I’ve been thinking of taking some more lessons. Bottom line, you NEVER stop learning. Good luck. I hope you can find your happy place behind a drum kit.

I think you get the idea. Patience is the key as well as perseverance.
 
MattRitter said:
To me, it seems pretty clear that you want to PLAY the drums, but you don’t want to STUDY the drums.

There’s nothing wrong with that. Studying music isn’t for everyone.

Step back and look objectively at your own words:



It sounds like you resent the teacher.



It sounds like you resent the underlying fundamentals of music.



It sounds like you resent the time commitment involved in the learning process.



It sounds like you resent practicing and attending the lessons.



It sounds like you resent the song repertoire that is part of the curriculum you signed up for.



It sounds like you resent the time frame that is mapped out for each portion of the curriculum you signed up for.



It sounds like you resent the fact that studying drums involves counting.



It sounds like you resent the financial cost of lessons.

Keep in mind that this entire undertaking is optional. You signed up for it willingly. However…when you did so, you probably had an entirely different idea about what it means to study drums.

Now that you’ve taken lessons with several different teachers, and have discovered the reality of what it means to study drums…give yourself permission to drop it. Rather than allowing all of this resentment to keep accumulating, give yourself permission to just quit lessons and let go of studying drums.

Finding yet ANOTHER teacher is not going to help. No matter what teacher you choose, they’re going to eventually attempt to help you study drumming since that’s what you’re paying them for. In other words, it will always eventually come back to semi-quavers and counting and 100 other things that you haven’t even mentioned yet (such as rudiments).

Let yourself off the hook. You willingly entered into this adventure, and you can willingly exit. Play the drums to your heart’s content in your own way with the songs that you like…but stop torturing yourself (and perhaps these drum teachers) by insisting on studying drums when you really don’t want to do so.

I sincerely hope this post gives you a new perspective that ultimately ends up being helpful to you.
Click to expand...
No actually I resent your reply! Because you are soooo wrong. Getting frustrated is normal and, ahem, I resent your implication that I am torturing the drum teachers! They all liked me and my commitment. I chose to leave. I am just a normal person who gets tired, frustrated and bored. I don't feel resentment for any of it actually. Have a look at the very first answer by Yamaha Rider. And see if you agree with that. If I resented it all so much, why would I still be persisting? I am sorry it took you so long to write that reply, and thank you for it but yeah, I resent it!
 
MattRitter said:
To me, it seems pretty clear that you want to PLAY the drums, but you don’t want to STUDY the drums.

There’s nothing wrong with that. Studying music isn’t for everyone.

Step back and look objectively at your own words:



It sounds like you resent the teacher.



It sounds like you resent the underlying fundamentals of music.



It sounds like you resent the time commitment involved in the learning process.



It sounds like you resent practicing and attending the lessons.



It sounds like you resent the song repertoire that is part of the curriculum you signed up for.



It sounds like you resent the time frame that is mapped out for each portion of the curriculum you signed up for.



It sounds like you resent the fact that studying drums involves counting.



It sounds like you resent the financial cost of lessons.

Keep in mind that this entire undertaking is optional. You signed up for it willingly. However…when you did so, you probably had an entirely different idea about what it means to study drums.

Now that you’ve taken lessons with several different teachers, and have discovered the reality of what it means to study drums…give yourself permission to drop it. Rather than allowing all of this resentment to keep accumulating, give yourself permission to just quit lessons and let go of studying drums.

Finding yet ANOTHER teacher is not going to help. No matter what teacher you choose, they’re going to eventually attempt to help you study drumming since that’s what you’re paying them for. In other words, it will always eventually come back to semi-quavers and counting and 100 other things that you haven’t even mentioned yet (such as rudiments).

Let yourself off the hook. You willingly entered into this adventure, and you can willingly exit. Play the drums to your heart’s content in your own way with the songs that you like…but stop torturing yourself (and perhaps these drum teachers) by insisting on studying drums when you really don’t want to do so.

I sincerely hope this post gives you a new perspective that ultimately ends up being helpful to you.
Click to expand...
P.S Also, do you know Rockschool? It doesn't necessarily take a year per grade/book and playing every song to perfection also isn't necessarily the curriculum. And also, I don't believe paying out that much money is necessary to be proficient.
 
MntnMan62 said:
It sounds like you are trying to rush things a bit. How long do YOU think it should take you “to be good”? You say learning the drums is hard. Yeah. You got that right. If it was easy everybody would do it. And that goes for not just many things but MOST things. How many years do you think Vinnie Colaiuta took lessons and studied before landing his first gig? You can replace Vinnie’s name with virtually any highly respected drummer out there in that sentence. Your comments also make me wonder what you think is “good”?

Tired of counting? Give up the drums. Tired of practicing? Give up the drums. You’ve been playing the drums for an entire year? That’s nothing. Being good at anything that is as complex as drumming where you have to use 4 limbs simultaneously and often some limbs are doing more than one thing at a time takes time.

My intent is not to diminish your drive and dream of being a “good” drummer. But I think your expectations are unrealistic. Others have said essentially the same things. Not all teachers are good teachers. And even a good teacher may not follow an approach to learning that works for you. That is part of the drumming journey. Finding someone who can guide you in drumming that matches your way of learning isn’t always easy.

I first started taking lessons from a local jazz player when I was 14. That was around 1976. I only mention that for context. He was a phenomenal player and he started me learning rudiments, basic beats and then when I was ready for it, he started me playing to records. He got sick and eventually passed away. I then sought lessons wherever I could. My best friend also played the drums back then and was a lot better than me. He was great about sharing some cool stuff that was particularly practical and directly applied to the drumset. Another friend who was also phenomenal gave me lessons for a bit. I took lessons at Drummers Collective. In college I was studying pre-law but took a class (lessons actually) that focused just on snare drumming. I also played in the jazz ensemble in college for class credit. I got some real valuable lessons from that in performance. I also took lessons from a local jazz drummer up there (Buffalo).

Someone else said you seem motivated to PLAY the drums but may not be motivated to STUDY the drums. I think his point is valid. If it’s not true, it will be up to you to prove that to yourself. Learning anything new is typically a process. That doesn’t mean you have to LOVE doing rudiments or counting but without the fundamentals you may not get very far. I’m 62 and restarted playing again after a 30 year hiatus (chasing a corporate career). And lately I’ve been thinking of taking some more lessons. Bottom line, you NEVER stop learning. Good luck. I hope you can find your happy place behind a drum kit.

I think you get the idea. Patience is the key as well as perseverance.
Click to expand...
I don't think anyone should suggest someone gives up the drums but thank you, because I just won't.
 
Yamaha Rider said:
I was told by a gigging drummer that as little as half a dozen lessons (I had about ten) can be enough foundation in the basics to start to teach yourself.
You can then learn a huge amount by PLAYING along to the music you love (a lot!) and applying those basics.
There's a ton of info online too (incl. DW!)
I'm now in my first gigging band and love it.
Alternatively, there is no limit to the skills you could learn through an academic course and working through book exercises - but it's not for everyone.
Click to expand...
Thank you. I do know the basics and can actually play the tracks to pass the exam and to go forward. And maybe to keep doing that over and over. I do slow it down, do do the counting and use a metronome and eventually my brain catches up. Thank you for your answer.
 
Tamboreter said:
I'm currently doing a "beginner" course on Drumeo just for maintenance. TBH, it's comparable to the Nirvana song you linked.

However, there are beginner courses on Drumeo that are much easier than the Nirvana song. I think I recommended Drumeo in your first post, so yes, I may sound like a broken record and probably isn't a helpful suggestion -sorry for that.

Have you tried playing along with drumless tracks available on YouTube??

Also sounds like it's time to ditch your teacher because he doesn't seem like a good fit. I'm sorry for your struggles with teachers, etc. IMO, it does sound like an online solution might be a good fit.

I think @Jonathan Curtis is in UK. He's a teacher and may be a good source for what to do next (I realize you didn't ask for suggestions, but your post begs a solution).

Please keep us posted regarding your progress. (y)
Click to expand...
Thank you. Just glad that some of these replies are positive and don't just tell me to give up the drums.
 
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